Hey Thanksgiving- I’ve got your back.

The red line is proving to be insufficient so I’ve moved on to stacking sandbags.

I’m willing to try anything to hold back the rapidly rising tide of Christmas that threatens to wash Thanksgiving down the river once and for all.

This wonderful day of food, faith, family, friendship, forefathers and football has become nothing more than a speed bump on the super highway to Holiday Town– and I for one resent the bullying.

So I will take my stand on the porch alongside my scarecrows.

I will hold my drumstick high and beat back any and all attempts to infiltrate my home with lights, wreaths or gingerbread men until this holiday has had her day.

I’ve got your back Thanksgiving.