Bending the Arc of your destiny..


My mother is a rock star..she really is.

Her will to bend the arc of her own life is something to behold. I’ll give you just two examples:

She was feeling blue a few weeks ago that Easter was coming and they had nothing going on. We don’t live down the road anymore, no one was slated to visit and they hadn’t been invited to brunch by anyone in their retirement community. “I just need to get over it” she said during one of our phone calls but then quickly changed her mind.

As a former teacher, my mom can’t let Columbus day go by without commemorating it in some way.. let alone Easter.   So off she went to Walgreens where she filled her basket with chocolate treats to give out to her neighbors and anyone else she thought she might run into whom she determined to be in “need.”  Then she got on the phone and invited some friends on her street to brunch at the club.  Did I mention she bought a fluffy bunny to decorate her own kitchen table?  My mom wasn’t about to let Easter hop away from her..NO! She grabbed it by the tail, wrestled it down and made it “sit & stay.” When she saw that it wasn’t “unfolding” as she’d hoped, she took charge and created the reality she wanted.

My second example is a lot more serious. A few years back she was diagnosed with a very serious issue that required weeks of  daily, painful and scary treatments. As she prepared for it, she asked that I take her to the store to buy a few sweatsuit sets  to wear when she went to the doctor’s office.

She never wore any of them.

You see, my mom is a fashion diva. Wearing sweatpants isn’t something she does, but she figured this was how one should dress when going for these daily therapies. But right before day 1, my mother decided that she was not about to dress down; not even for this s***.  She was going to face the maelstrom with make-up on her face and her style securely intact.

And she did.

This simple act of defiance brought so much joy to the nurses and to the other patients she met every day..and I would dare say, the realization that she was bringing “light” to others going through their own darkness probably helped her navigate this very, very tough period.

So yeah,  my mom is still challenging what’s inevitable,  turning expectations on their head, and wrestling with “destiny.”  Not bad for a legally blind, 85 year old.. rock star.😊





photocredit:Free Historical Stock Photos,


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